The Chewbacca Defense

“Vem dormir. Chega de ler”

E daí hoje fiquei sabendo que ele estava preso na Wikipedia porque seguiu um link do Damages, por causa do ator gayzola do The Event, e que também aparece em Donnie Brasco. Chegou aqui:

Pérola do South Park. O Netflix tem muitas coisas boas, mas só o South Park já pagaria [escrito em 2012. Infelizmente Depois o Netflix tirou South Park]:

“In the episode, Chef contacts a “major record company” executive, seeking only to have his name credited as the composer of “Stinky Britches”. Chef’s claim is substantiated by a 20‑year-old recording of Chef performing the song.

The record company refuses, and furthermore hires Johnnie Cochran, who files a lawsuit against Chef for harassment. In court, Cochran resorts to his “famous” Chewbacca defense, which he “used during the Simpson trial”, according to Chef’s lawyer, Gerald Broflovski. Although Broflovski uses logic, reasoning and the fact that Chef properly copyrighted his work, he is then followed by Cochran:

Cochran …ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, I have one final thing I want you to consider. Ladies and gentlemen, this is Chewbacca. Chewbacca is a Wookiee from the planetKashyyyk. But Chewbacca lives on the planet Endor. Now think about it; that does not make sense!Gerald Broflovski Damn it! … He’s using the Chewbacca defense!Cochran Why would a Wookiee, an 8-foot-tall Wookiee, want to live on Endor, with a bunch of 2-foot-tall Ewoks? That does not make sense! But more important, you have to ask yourself: What does this have to do with this case? Nothing. Ladies and gentlemen, it has nothing to do with this case! It does not make sense! Look at me. I’m a lawyer defending a major record company, and I’m talkin’ about Chewbacca! Does that make sense? Ladies and gentlemen, I am not making any sense! None of this makes sense! And so you have to remember, when you’re in that jury room deliberatin’ and conjugatin’ the Emancipation Proclamation, does it make sense? No! Ladies and gentlemen of this supposed jury, it does not make sense! If Chewbacca lives on Endor, you must acquit! The defense rests.[1]”

Acho que eu não teria coragem de usar a Chewbacca Defense. Mas o nome é coisa de gênio.